No, criticism of Emma Swan that talks about her becoming a Stepford wife is not the same as saying a strong female character can’t fall in love, get, married, and have kids. That is not what the criticism is about.
What it is about is that ONE THING becoming her defining characteristic.
I’m sorry, but if you think her growing up and learning to love means that she has to accept every shitty thing her boyfriend does without more than a “that was kinda bad, lol”, if you think that means that Emma’s happy ending isn’t getting to fight for her son and his happy ending… Then I don’t fucking understand your definition of “strong female character.”