March Madness, Strikes, I would never write meme

[holdouttrout]

My office is not betting on the ourcome of the March Madness brackets, but we did all fill them out. For not knowing ANY of the teams, I'm not doing too badly, so far. *grins* I've got 14 wins, and no one seems to think I'm *too* stupid with my picks. Yet.

I er...think the idea of a strike today is kinda ridiculous. Plus, it's FRIDAY. Come on, people--nobody posts enough on Fridays in the first place.

I also updated my website with all the fic I'd written between November 2007 and now. There...wasn't as much as there should have been. Although there was quite a nice bit of porn. And two LONGish fics. So that's alright. I added a "Smut and Mature" fics page and a "Long Fics" page. I'm very haphazard about the whole thing, but it works for me. Still gotta think about actual webspace and er...coming up with something a little more organized.

I want to do the "I will never write" meme again. So, comment and give me something--ANYTHING--you think I'd never ever write. I can't guarantee that it won't be crackfic, but...I don't think y'all would mind too much. *g* Er...feel free to give me a pairing and/or a prompt. And break OTPs. If you wish.

Comments

[splash-the-cat.livejournal.com]

Cam becomes the gestational surrogate for Sam and Vala's triplets. And Daniel and Cam get trapped in a supply closet, and Cam goes into labor, and Daniel is the one who has to deliver the babies. But then Janet Descends from her heretofore unknown Ascension to talk him through it, and they all live happily ever after.

Except Cam, who never actually really thought about how the babies were going to come out.

THE END.

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

But....you just wrote it for me!

[surreallis.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHA!

Oh, Cam. You just didn't realize what you were in for...

[abyssinia4077.livejournal.com]

...I LOVE YOUR BRAIN!

I would pay (maybe not real money) to read that crack!fic.

[shutthef-up.livejournal.com]

Oooh, now *that's* gotta hurt! And Triplets!

Bwah-hah!

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

Cam screamed and tightened his grip on Daniel's finger as another contraction hit. As it loosened its hold on his body, he panted and let out expletives with each breath.

Daniel tried to flex his fingers, but Cam wasn't letting go again, and Daniel didn't feel like pressing the issue. He said, "Er...Are you doing okay?"

Cam grunted, glaring at him.

"How do you think I'm doing, Jackson? I'm giving birth to triplets, and God didn't exactly give me the right eq--" Another wave of pain contorted his features. When it was over, he collapsed back against the wall of the storage closet. "Fuck. For this, they better let me watch!"

Daniel was beginning to get a bit nervous. He'd helped deliver two other babies before, but this was--

This was different.

Cam screamed again, and this time Daniel felt himself get lightheaded from the pressure on his fingers--he could see the world washing out and everything.

Funny--he was still upright. Usually when he fainted it went a lot more quickly...

The light grew stronger and stronger, and finally coalesced into a familiar shape.

Daniel blinked.

"Janet?"

She was dressed in a dazzling white lab coat, and was a little...sparkly.

"You're sparkly," Cam said faintly.

Janet glared at Daniel. "Is this your fault?" she asked.

Daniel shook his head. "Sam and Vala."

"I'm their damn surrogate," Cam grunted.

Janet pursed her lips, obviously not entirely happy with this news, but shook it off as Cam screamed again.

"That's impressive," she commented to Daniel, who could no longer feel his hands.

She studied Cam for a few seconds and then reached toward him, her hands white around the edges.

"Wait--" said Daniel, "what about interfering?"

But Janet just smiled and kept reaching, and in a few seconds she was holding a squirming little girl, which she deposited into Daniel's arms, going back for another--this one a boy, and the third, another girl with a shock of dark hair, which she gave to Cam.

"There," she said, starting to unravel around the edges.

"Wait, I--" Daniel started to say, but she was already gone.

The closet door opened, and Sam and Vala came in with worried expressions.

"Are you--" Sam started, and then they spotted the babies.

"Oh," Vala said.

"My," Sam said.

"God," Landry said from just behind them.

Daniel gave a baby each to Sam and Vala, who fell into cooing noises.

"Thank you so much," Sam said to Cam. "And Daniel, for deliv--"

"Wasn't me," Daniel said. "Janet. She ascended."

Sam looked puzzled, but Landry just nodded. He'd known all along, of course.

Cam thrust the last one back toward Daniel, and let his head fall back against the stone wall. "I am never volunteering for anything ever again."

[splash-the-cat.livejournal.com]

There was nothing about that which was not MADE OF WIN.

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

*takes a modest bow*

[phdelicious.livejournal.com]

I was going to second surreallis's mpreg request. Then I saw this. OMG! Crack is Whack but soooo much fun!

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Thankyouverymuch.

[abyssinia4077.livejournal.com]

YOU WIN THE INTERNETS OMG!

(the best part was how in character it is for being crack.)

"they'd better let me watch" and Daniel being nervous and Janet and Daniel just...oh, man, this is pure gold!

*loves you*

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

Ta da! Thank you for all you kind compliments. *g*

[pulsar4529.livejournal.com]

Janet glared at Daniel. "Is this your fault?" she asked.
Haha!

So great, ftw!

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

Thank you! This was mondo fun.

[mrspollifax.livejournal.com]

"Oh," Vala said.

"My," Sam said.

"God," Landry said from just behind them.

Oh, the uncontrollable giggles ....

You are awesome.

[holdouttrout.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Poor Cam.